Our Inner Child – Divine Essence, our purest form of Self – is at the essence of all my offerings. Why? Our Inner Child is our pure soul, our passion, our light, and connected to our purpose. Somewhere along the way for many of us we get somewhat disconnected from this essence, especially during challenging times in our lives – yet this is the time we need to nurture this part of ourselves the most. Through connecting to and nurturing our Inner Child, we become re-acquainted with what truly brings us peace, love, joy, and alignment in our lives.
For those of us who work with and or have little ones in our lives, this work is essential. It’s so important for us to be aware of our patterns and to be able to be truly present, in order to empower little ones with healthy life skills and end unhealthy cycles.
So how do we become disconnected from our Inner Child?
Through life experiences including trauma, obligations we feel we have to others (don’t get me wrong – it’s important to be responsible), and social pressures. An area that comes up commonly in my work is trauma – big and little, because it is so far reaching impacts our lives in ways we may not even be aware of. We are beautifully adaptive creatures – able to bury deep issues in order to keep going… and we have the power to create incredible change in our lives when we unearth it.
Trauma is when something ‘too much, too soon, or too fast’ happens to us. It’s totally subjective, meaning two people can be exposed to the same experience but respond differently based on their past experiences, current state, and resilience. It takes many forms and overlaps amongst many of these; collective and individual, single events or ongoing, emotional (neglect, abuse etc), physical (violence, accidents etc), sexual, spiritual, birth, childhood, and includes micro-stressors from toxins within the body, negative patterns, and multi-tasking.
Initially we will respond with one of the following responses:
Fight – our bodies get ready to protect us (a sympathetic response)
Flight – our bodies get ready to run (a sympathetic response)
Freeze – shock (a dorsal, sympathetic response)
Fawn – shying away or playing small (a parasympathetic response)
In order to continue coping, we may display various patterns, to include:
The impacts on our body are far reaching – from our emotional and physical well-being, to our patterns of mind and habits, our relationships, our sense of self and worth. Our body in it’s attempt to protect us and enable us to continue to survive, creates interesting shortcuts in our bodies and minds, which when reinforced (again through mechanisms to try to support our survival ability) create further challenges including physical imbalances and chronic illness, until we are able take a courageous and curious look at what is really at the root of it. The science behind trauma is fascinating, mainly because when we do understand this, we also understand how we can create powerful transformation in our lives. Our Parasympathetic Nervous System and Vagus Nerve (10th cranial nerve) are deeply intertwined in either reinforcing or supporting healthy change in our lives.
Trauma is healed through connecting, to ourselves and in relationships with others. Most importantly, we need to be ready to look at the core of it. It’s a process of unearthing, taking courage and curiosity. While the left brain tries to understand the logic in what happened , this doesn’t actually help us move forward. It’s connecting to our right intuitive, sensing brain that allows us to move through healing transformation. Tools that support our nervous system healing include; breath work, movement, meditation or mindfulness, sound and voice work, telling our story, having healthy support and meaningful connection, nutritious foods, sleep, affirmation, EFT, being in the moment, self-love, creating healthy boundaries, laughter, understanding the power of choice (this was HUGE for me undoing childhood trauma in my early twenties). It’s not a quick fix and triggers will continue to surface, but overtime we are more comfortable handling them. These tools are also critically important for us even if we are not currently dealing with trauma – they help us to stay connected to and nurture our Inner Child for greater resilience, so when we do face challenges, we are better equipped to move through them with greater ease. These are the tools we explore in all my trainings along with an in-depth look at the nervous + craniosacral system, and the science behind trauma.
Below are more tools you can access for support to empower yourself as a parent and in-turn your children.
Please reach out if you have any questions – I always love to hear from you!
ps. Please share this with anyone you feel would benefit!